Building Motivation with the PINCH Strategy: A Neurodivergent-Affirming Approach to ADHD and Executive Functioning
If you’re parenting a child with ADHD or other neurodivergent traits, you’ve likely wrestled with that frustrating question: Why won’t they just do it? Whether it's homework, brushing teeth, or taking out the garbage, things that seem easy to others can feel like climbing Everest for a neurodivergent brain.
The reality? It's not laziness, defiance, or lack of care. It's about how their brain is wired—and how we can work with it, not against it.
Understanding Executive Function & ADHD
As a psychotherapist, one of the most important tools I share with families is psychoeducation: when we understand how the brain works, we can respond with empathy instead of frustration.
Children with ADHD often struggle with executive functioning, which is like the brain’s management system. This includes skills like:
Initiating tasks
Planning and organizing
Regulating emotions
Sustaining attention
Shifting focus
In neurotypical brains, these functions are supported by a delicate dance of brain chemicals—especially dopamine and norepinephrine. In ADHD brains, these chemicals don’t flow the same way. Tasks that feel boring or unstimulating (like chores or homework) don’t light up the brain’s reward system the same way they do for others.
But that doesn’t mean kids with ADHD can’t be motivated. They just need a different entry point—one that creates a dopamine-rich environment. That’s where PINCH comes in.
What Is the PINCH Strategy?
PINCH is a motivation framework designed for brains that need novelty, stimulation, and relevance in order to activate. It stands for:
P – Play
I – Interest
N – Novelty
C – Competition
H – Hurry-Up (Urgency)
Also known as the INCUP strategy in some circles (Interest, Novelty, Challenge, Urgency, Passion), this framework gives us a new lens to work through when supporting motivation—especially in kids with ADHD.
How PINCH Supports Motivation in ADHD Brains
🧠 1. It Leverages Dopamine Triggers
Each element of PINCH taps into systems in the brain that release dopamine, which is often in short supply in ADHD brains. When kids feel excited, challenged, or under playful pressure, their brains come alive.
🧠 2. It Shifts the Narrative Around “Willpower”
Instead of trying to force children into neurotypical molds—“Just try harder!”—we give them tools that fit how their brain actually works. This isn't about lowering expectations—it's about changing the path to the same outcome.
PINCH in Action: Real-Life Examples
Here’s how you might apply the PINCH framework to daily tasks:
🧽 Chores
Play: Turn it into a dance party—“Let’s see how many toys we can pick up before the song ends!”
Novelty: Switch it up—use tongs to pick up socks, or try “backward cleaning” (start from a new room).
Competition: “Bet you can’t beat my score at making the bed in under 2 minutes!”
📚 Homework
Interest: Start with a subject your child loves or let them choose the order of tasks.
Urgency: Use a visual timer or challenge them to “race the clock.”
Play: Try turning math into a board game or spelling words into a scavenger hunt.
Reframing “Success” for Neurodivergent Kids
It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing our children to neurotypical expectations. But when we recognize that neurodivergence isn’t a flaw—it’s a difference, we create space for our kids to feel capable, understood, and successful on their terms.
Supporting motivation in ADHD isn’t about punishment or pressure. It’s about providing the right scaffolding—one built on curiosity, fun, and understanding.
Final Thoughts: Embrace the Brain, Build the Bridge
When we adopt tools like PINCH, we stop swimming upstream. We stop fighting against the child’s neurology, and we begin to build bridges between what they need and what the world asks of them.
We shift from “Why can’t they just do it?” to “What does their brain need in order to get there?”
And that shift—compassionate, affirming, and deeply empowering—makes all the difference.